You want to know a secret?
Underneath this facade of charming unemotional goodness, I am really a big drippy mess just like the rest of you. There is no place where that shines through more than my blog.
And I swear to God, if another man tells me that I’m strong and independant and “not like most girls” I am going to scream. Because your so wrong.
The more accurate statement is that I keep my cool better than everyone else, because I’m secretly a disaster.
Just like most girls, I have my nights when I’m antsy as hell, and I don’t sleep because everything in my life has become overwhelming.
Just like most girls, I sometimes stare at my phone and wonder why in the hell it is not ringing. And then curse profusely when the wrong person calls.
Just like most girls, I cry occasionally. The difference is, I do it alone in the car with the music blasting and I pull my shit together before I leave my vehicle.
I’m not gonna lie to you, I’m a cliche just like everyone else.
And I’m not that interesting unless you spend some time getting to know me.
Its really not much of a secret, Mychal.
You present a confident exterior, yes. But it doesn’t mean its a front, that you are hiding a weak, scared, pathetic glob of humanity….it is a natural result of you having overcome some shitty stuff, and emerging from those experiences as someone who does not place blame on others, who doesn’t harbor resentment, and who isn’t mean, or petty. I can’t tell you how important that is.
You are growing, still, as am I. Be ok with that.